For the first time in my life I think I could do drugs. Really. Not the kind prescribed from the doctor either.
No downers for me - no sir. I want the stuff that ramps you up. Speed. I have no idea what does that - but I want it. I had a small taste of it today and it was delicious.
I'm no longer a big caffeine drinker. I'll have a Coca-cola when I'm out for dinner but I rarely buy it, if ever.
I also don't drink coffee. I've never had an entire actual cup of coffee in my life.
Yet - I found myself in the middle of night a couple of months ago at Tim Horton's door. There I found deliciousness. The iced cappuccino. Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelicious. I'm addicted.
This morning I had to run an errand after I dropped Julia at the bus. I couldn't bring myself to drive across town to Tim Horton's. So I hit McDonald's and bought one of the Paul Newman Iced Coffees. It was ok. A little toooo coffee for me - but good enough.
Then I decided to drive around for a while. I ended up at Tim Horton's. I broke down and bought an iced cappuccino.
OH MY GOODNESS. I was sooooooooooooooo ramped up. I can't even begin to explain it. When we finally got back home I was like a crazy person. I did dishes, laundry, got on the floor and scrubbed it with spray and paper towels, I swept. I cleaned out the girls toys. I did Namaste Yoga. I threw stuff away. I organized the diapers, pull-ups and wipes. I made lunch. I bagged snacks for the girls for later. I did jumping jacks on the back porch (OUCH b*oobs!!). I washed all of Em's toys. I almost washed the windows but I realized I had to pick Julia up from school. Then I drove around neighborhoods looking at houses for sale. Then we came home and ran around outside picking up trash that blew all over from the trash that turned upside down. Then I came inside and made dinner. Within 15 minutes after dinner was done, the dishes were washed, the stove was cleaned, the table scrubbed. Then I scrubbed Em's high chair seat. Oh - then I took everything off the counter in the kitchen and scrubbed it down. Then I went through the medications in our lock box and checked expiration dates. Then when Dan took the girls up for their bath - I picked up what they had gotten out earlier. Then I went upstairs and brought all the laundry down. Got Em from Dan and dried her off and got her dressed. Got Julia and Anna ready for bed. Took a shower. Cleaned the bathroom.
Then I had a phone call from a good friend of mine and then I SAT DOWN.
Man. That's more than I've done in weeks. I'm thinking I need to find a dealer. I haven't been that artificially high in my life.