Ugh - you know you are a mom when you have to carefully plan and concoct elaborate set-ups so that you can cleanse yourself!
The process to shower as a mom is about an hour - here is the breakdown:
25 minutes making sure all the needs of the almost 11 month old are met
*Feed baby
*Clean baby from smearing food all over exposed body parts
*Change diaper
10 -15 minutes searching for video/toy/entraptment device combination that will safely hold babies attention for the 3 1/2 minutes you will actually be in the shower. This may require 2-3 attempts to find magical combination of things.
5 minutes convincing 4 year old big sister that she needs to leave the baby alone long enough to fully cleanse hair and wipe dried baby food off from previous feeding session.
5 minutes of bathroom time - quick visit to the potty (yes - at 29 I use the term to describe my personal bathroom use), get temperature of water slightly above freezing, wash hair and clean body... if the planets align in your favor - you might get through shaving of hair off of ONE body part. Think this through - which arm pit or leg is important enough to be hairless!
Now - if when you exit the shower and you don't hear screaming or sirens - go ahead and take 2 minutes to dry off before attempting to put bra (that used to fit before you have kids) on and whatever clothes you can find that are relatively stain free.
WHOO HOO - you have successfully gotten clean!
Now - repeat procedure to get hair dry and styled - if you actually still do that!
Note - some have recommended I try to shower while baby is napping. first - what is a nap? and 2nd - why does the quiet sound of water trickling from the faucet alert my baby 3 rooms over (who can normally sleep through vacuuming) to the fact I'm attempting to clean mysself - and require incessant screaming! :)
Gotta go - I myself am going to attempt the cycle - wish me luck!
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